Happy Monday morning! Mmmm, my coffee is brewing, checking emails, working on my to-do list. I hope you had a restful weekend and are looking forward to the week ahead.
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About a year ago I read "The Help" for Book Club. It was a quick easy read and very thought provoking. I finally saw the movie this weekend and really enjoyed it. It got me thinking about the difference in social norms and culture back then, along with the role of women as wives and mothers.
The stay-at-home mom..
.. the look of the day..
..and the working woman (oh goodness, how might I help here?)
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Was life simple for women back then? They seemed to have clearly defined roles and few choices in their life path. Fast forward 60 years, the modern Mom has a much more complex life. She can do it all if she wants to and she is great at multitasking, right? A typical Mom today might assume role as primary care-taker of the kids, manage the house chores, plan meals, and then moments later - take off her track shoes and put on her heels, heading out the door for a long day at the office.
I felt curious watching the cast of characters in this movie. What if I were a young Mom back then? What would my life have been like?
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What was a woman like back in the 50's? I could see parts of my Mother in this movie and memories returned as I recall her saying ".. I didn't nurse you because I was told it wasn't necessary and Moms had more important things to do.." As my Mother observed me raising my own daughter, she heard me say " you are my little princess and I love you so much... you can do it, follow your heart, (and during the awkward years) look how pretty your are!" My Mother would say "it will be interesting to see how your daughter grows up .. you do things differently .. why do you call her your little princess and tell her she is beautiful? I never said those kinds of things to you because I was told that would make you think too highly of yourself.." There is no doubt that Mother's loved their children back then - things were different.
My Father was born in the South and I have four cousins (Paula, Pam, Patty, Penny) and an Aunt that still reside there. When my son was an infant (almost 20 yrs ago) we traveled there to visit my ailing Grandmother. The culture at that time was reminiscent of the 50's scenario that I saw in the movie, and I recall having several uncomfortable moments. My cousins found it a-bit "old fashioned" that I nursed my child and the men were terribly uncomfortable with the thought of it. Thus I got in the habit of nursing in private where no one might get a glimpse of this odd and mildly exhibitionist behavior. One afternoon we enjoyed a ladies lunch HERE
and I was escorted by "the help" to a private room when my son needed attention. I was cared for by a kind old woman whose face and loving kindness I will never forget.It's safe to say we have evolved as wives and mothers. My daughter is a much different young woman than I was at her age and I certainly have no regrets about telling her that she was a beautiful little princess.
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leslie
How interesting! I often have thought about what life would have been like growing up during those times. Thinking if women's lives were easier because they had a defined place/role. Not that I would want to turn back time but I'd love to live it for a week. I watched The Tree of Life last week and parts of that movie reminded me of my grandparents and how they raised my mother and aunts and uncles. It was such a different time.
ReplyDeleteHi Leslie...I'm so glad I finally popped over you have a wonderful blog! While I don't have children I do remember my grandmother telling my mother not to encourage me about doing/being anything I wanted. Thank Good that fell on deaf ears, what were women thinking back then? I don't know if my life would be any easier with a defined female role more then likely not but then again I wouldn't have to move heavy rocks...;) I'm going to add you to my blog roll so I'll be sure to keep visiting!
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Debra~
My mother worked when I was younger and I remember at that time she was very unique ... most all mothers were home. I am so thankful that my mother pushed me to be anything I wanted ... and still does to this day. And I love, even more, that today - women can make the choice for themselves!
ReplyDeleteGood evening Leslie!
ReplyDeleteThese pictures took me back to my childhood when my mom stayed at home. I grew up thinking I would follow in her footsteps, but it did not turn out that way. I have no children, but have a GREAT HUSBAND and a career. But these pictures have a certain je ne sais quoi to them that incite a past world where coming home from school and smelling a freshly baked chocolate cake, seeing newly sewn Barbie cloths on my bed and having a mom who helped with the PTA at school just give me joy.
THANK YOU FOR VISITING AGAIN and for leaving such a lovely comment. Tomorrow on Valentine's Day will make 32 years that my husband and I met. Time is really a gift, for it passes too quickly. ENJOY!!!!!! Anita
What a wonderful day to meet Anita! My husband and I met 32 years ago and will be married 29 years this July (where does the time go?) Your blog is lovely! You write beautifully and your pictures are always perfect. I appreciate your kind and enthusiastic comments. Without really knowing you, I can tell you are a positive and happy individual and I'm so glad I have the opportunity to get to know you!
DeleteEnjoy your special day!
I applaud you for encouraging your daughter to be all that she can and most of all for letting her know how precious and beautiful she is. No matter how old she gets.. or when she has children of her own, she will know that she will forever be your little princess. We don't have children (not by choice) but, when our Goddaughter visits... we always tell her how wonderful she is ..and that she can do anything (she will be 7 later this month).
ReplyDeleteWe watched the help a few weeks ago.. and it was interesting to watch the differences from then to now ... though I think in some parts of the southern states it still remains similar.
Thank you for your visits and wonderful sweet comments..Happy Valentine's day, xo HHL
What a great post! I haven't watched the movie yet but have read the book. I remember thinking how amazing my mum was/is, especially when we were growing up - going to work, looking after the home and us. I recently volunteered at a 9-5 sort of a work place, and I was so exhausted. I did it for a couple of months and it's hard (I just had a husband no kids!) I loved reading this Leslie. Thanks for stopping by my blog today and leaving some love :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful post! The times sure have changed. I've been wanting to see that film but I'll have to wait for the DVD.
ReplyDeleteThis is so interesting to think about. Even though we can now do it all, I feel like we're paying a price for it. Sometimes I think like would have been more simple in those days.
ReplyDeletebeautiful B&W photos
ReplyDeleteThis is so poignant and well written. It's so true how times have changed. When I was growing up every Mom in the neighborhood stayed home. My Mom, who I adore, was not overly affectionate but I never doubted she loved me. I tell my daughter everyday how beautiful she is and encourage her to go after what she wants. What I notice is that she has a quiet confidence that I never had at her young age. My Mom has told me several times that she thinks I am a wonderful mother and she even wishes she had a mom as good as me. That was probably the sweetest thing that has ever came out of Mom's mouth. xo
ReplyDeleteI think it's so interesting...how children were raised then and now..there is so much more information around since then. It seemed women back then had everything sorted at times, but I think they had to as it was just so different. My mom didn't tell us we were beautiful or anything, she wasn't that nice really, I didn't learn confidence from her. Now I tell my daughters every day, but I can see it giving them confidence and belief in themselves not arrogance. They go out of the door knowing someone in this cold world loves them and there is never anything wrong with that!! :) xx
ReplyDeleteSometimes I feel we might take on too make duties, I like to delegate once in a while and step back , take a breath, and enjoy it before it slips away.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.badbarbara.com
great post!!! i love everything 50's and 60's :)
ReplyDeletetake care. xoxo, Haus of Gala
Loved the book and the movie...hard to believe it was here first novel!!
ReplyDeleteGreat post, I agree, women have changed so much! I do love the style from backthen though! xx
ReplyDeleteSuch an interesting post. I don't know... I really think I would have been a horrible homemaker back then. They worked so HARD to maintain a household and my husband spoils me with doing the laundry and dishes. I could never let that go.
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